TAXI BOMBS!!! H.O.P.E. VICTORY!!!

HOPE and America triumphed again last Thursday after waging what E! online called "an all out war on the Jimmy Fallon bomb Taxi".

The film was put out of its misery with a funeral for its death held at Lowes Theater on the waterfront in Pittsburgh.

Seven taxi cabs circled the theater, and a gathering crowd cheered on as HOPE members gave last rites, shared feelings about the monstrosity, and Chris Jackson delivered a fitting eulogy:

"Taxi, we are sending you off to the great unknown of basic cable with other such films by SNL alums as Night at the Roxbury, The Animal, The Ladies Man, Coneheads, and Superstar. Jimmy Fallon, may God, and the USA cable network, have mercy on your soul."